Solo Sport? A shout out to my homies.

Behind every great champion is several great people.Cycling at my level is pretty much a solo sport. I don't really do road races where I depend on team tactics, nor do does a team factor into my cyclocross or mountain bike races. Being part of a "team" is great, but the outcome of my race doesn't depend on it like Pro Tour racers do. However, not having 6 people around me to chase and pull me around in a crit doesn't mean I complete solo. My solo cycling sport is very much a "team" effort.

The now finished Olympics got me thinking about this. A friend made a comment about how Apollo was a great solo athlete. For me, when I look at Apollo, I see a athlete who has formed a great team of people around him. I firmly believe that good solo athletes gather the best resources they can find and put the information they are given to action.

I have a very busy and sometimes unpredictable job. I have spent the last 2-3 years maximizing the experts around me to help me make the best out of the time I have to help me focus on being a good athlete. By doing that I would like to think that I have made some huge gains in my cycling abilities. My training and equipment prep really has no time for error. I'm no Apollo but for me, I narrow down my team to a couple hands full of people (in no particular order):

1. My biggest step was getting a cycling coach. For anyone who can afford a coach, I think it is a huge advantage if you have a limited amount of time to devote to training. Drt writes my cycling plans and changes them as I change. 'Nuff said.

2. Darrel Carr, my strength and core coach. May be my biggest secret weapon right now! Darrel handles it all except stuff I do directly on the bike. He is there for nutrition, supplements, core, stretching, lifting, and has a general understanding of the body in a different light than most people could even imagine. He has also worked countless hours on focusing on my injuries and how to come back strong from them.

3. Anne Young, my new teammate and long time riding buddy. Anne spent the weekend dragging me around on my windy rides and did the same thing last year after my surgery to help me get back in shape. Anne travels and takes off on adventures with me, listens to my crazy ideas, and keeps me motivated. She may not be someone people know much of in the historical cycling ring, but Anne is vital to my success. She just doesn't really know it. I liken Anne and I to College and Lance Armstrong, or a good sparring partner to a top MMA fighter.

4. Joey H., my massage therapist. Joe and I spent every Monday in cross season together working out the kinks and knots of racing and traveling for 14 weeks straight. Joe is a progressive therapist and can find a trigger point like a heat seeking missile. Now I see him about every 2 weeks, but I can't state how vital a massage is to keeping a healthy system. He is a great massage therapist and would be good enough to hit the pro tour teams if he wanted. Get a massage!

5. Summit City Bikes/ Terry T/ Barry M and the gang: They are a bike dealer, but they also deal with me. Deal with my multiple bikes, requests, and keep the machines running as I need them to personally (and I have lots of personal preferences). On average, I have about 3 bikes of my 7 or 8 that I need to be running race ready at any given moment. That means fitted to me with their fit system, running smoothly, getting parts ordered, and not letting me get to out of control with the "bling" of the industry. They are my pit crew and anyone knows that has ever watched a race car race, that without a pit crew; your shit doesn't move!

6. My family. Yep, they put up with a lot. I won't even get started in all they do for me because it would take up pages and still not do them justice. They are every bit of a cyclist that I am- they just don't do the pedaling.

7. Great Lakes Anesthesia, co-workers, and surgical family. The people I work with are my family in many ways. We experience people's life's in ways that most people can never even fathom. We have some tough times and some very rewarding times that can't be replicated in an office type setting. Work effects your riding and that can't be denied and my peeps at work know all about my riding, they have to listen to me ramble about it all day long!

(My Great Lakes Family: Anesthesia at its best!)

8. Eby, aka Black Kitty. Should a common house cat make the list? Heck yeah! She offers peace and joy every time I come home. She watches me ride the trainer and curls up to keep me warm after a cold ride. That is priceless!

(Black Kitty, striking a pose)

That's just a few that help make my wheels go 'round. Success never happens alone and I'm very thankful for the people who have stuck by me and believed in me over the years. I'm getting to a point where I am in need of a fair amount more industry and equipment support, but at least I know who will be by my side no matter what. Thanks Homies- you help me look good solo.

So how do You feel?

(Many moons ago riding the Katy trail in MO)
So we are well into the dog days of winter here in Northern Indiana and the trainer is becoming a staple in many of our training plans. For me, I am almost left with no option but to spin away indoors and go nowhere as ankle surgery makes it a little risky to go outside on slick roads. The biggest breakthrough for me since the last post is that I was able to finally get a little reprieve from the inside riding and hit the open roads. I really wasn't quite due to go outside per surgeon orders yet, but despite what some may think, I used good judgement and felt I was ready to get out. Even though the 3 rides I had outside were bitterly cold, I had so much fun riding that I really didn't notice. I've had several periods of time in my life where I have been forced to not ride outside for extended periods of time and it really gives me an appreciation for the sport I love. Its like the saying, "you don't know what you have until it's gone." Yeah, that's pretty much it.

My first ride back started at the top of my driveway. I live on a slight hill so I had a little decent to go down first thing. I will be honest, I was a little scared to even go down this "hill" not knowing how the ankle would handle the dip at the bottom. So with butterflies in my stomach, I pushed off. Whew!!!! Here I go! I had flashbacks to when I was a kid in my hometown when us neighborhood kids would see how far we could go no- hands down the big hill on our bikes. It was a scary, exciting, and a fun thing to do. To push each other to the limits of our human abilities. That's what cycling is about: FUN.

Sometimes I think it is about handling suffering, getting to know your inner self when you are at your harshest times. Maybe somewhat, but not really. Its about going forward the fastest, smoothest, and most near perfection as you can. This is everything contrary to riding the trainer! Sure, you can find pleasure in hitting some big watts on the trainer and breaking a personal best. But riding the trainer doesn't "feel" like riding. We call it going for a bike "ride," not going for a bike "pedal." Rides are fun adventures. Pedaling is an act of doing.

I don't race other people to beat other people. I race them because they might beat me, forcing me better myself in the process. If someone steps it up a notch, then I have to do the same myself which only makes me get closer to my perfect form. I race to win, but its the most fun to me when I am truly challenged. It about progression of oneself to me and I really do want to race other people that progress themselves too.

In the BMX days, a group of us would get together on practice days and hit a section of the track time after time after time. Hours on end we would do only one section to see who could one up each other. Even though you always wanted to be the one up, you always wanted the next person to one up you again. Because the challenge was the fun part. Let's see how far we can take it! How cool did it feel to hit a section as smooth as you ever thought possible only to turn around and hit it even smoother 2 hours later? Well, it's our air-o-plane.

Point is, the trainer is a necessary tool to progress our fitness in the Midwest. But I don't like it. Its a dead feeling to me, and its all because we ride our bikes to feel. Some people want to feel different things at different times. To me, I want the rush it brings. Whatever that may be for any given day. So maybe ask yourself, how do you feel? And to what lengths do you go to feel it?

"Hey look Mom and Dad! I'm riding away from you!"

That's what I still remember the first time without training wheels as I screamed to my parents as I headed away from them.

"I'm really doing it!"

It only took me one try, no wrecks, no problems. I took off, looked back at my parents very calmly and saw such a look of joy and relieve (yet fear) in their expressions. I felt such a rush! I turned back, facing the road and whispered to myself:

"this feels like so much fun!"

The same feeling I had before riding down my driveway the other day.

Yeah, that's pretty much how I feel still.

It's my air-o-plane.

Big Little Steps. Bigger Goals.

That's it! The moon boot is no longer! I am now past the 8 weeks post-op mark and I couldn't wait to retire this nasty thing. I was sure it weighed at least 5 pounds, so I thought I would get a real measure of it... turns out to only be 2.4 ibs. So I lost that much weight, but after being fairly inactive, I have a few more of my own to lose than that. Anyway, graduating out of the protection of the boot is a BIG step, but not being able to "push off" with a atrophied calf muscle has me taking little steps right now, but stronger and stronger each day. I thought I might come up with some cleaver way to destroy the boot, but I think with my luck, I will keep it around to fend off any bad mojo.

So, the next big step I had was moving onto a smaller version of an aircast with activities and walking. This splint is still pretty bulky, and dorky looking, but it beats the one that came all the way up my leg. Aside from the required compression hose to keep the swelling down, and the ankle brace, I almost could pass as any other normal person riding the trainer.

That's right. I'm full time clipped in! Its kind of funny to take my foot out of my shoe while it is still clipped in, but I will take it for now! I also can now consistently hit the 100 watt mark. This seems like a little step in the right direction, but it is a huge mental boost to see 3 digits on the power meter compared to only 2. And in other big news; I made it down a flight of stairs yesterday in a normal fashion instead of 1 step at a time. Anyone who has ever had a limb out of contention knows what I mean when you find out just how vital they are to do the little things we take for granted. Stairs are a very complex movement and it was good feeling to not take forever to get down them. Nice.

Little steps at a time.

So, I know everyone in the cycling world knows the big news about cyclocross world championships coming to L'ville in 2013. I feel like we are very blessed in this part of the US to have such a huge deal so close to us, not to mention the fact that it will be held at the same venue as the one we will do many, many races at before that big weekend comes. As much as I am thrilled with the WC coming, I am even more excited that we have also received the Master's world championships bid for 2012 and 2013. Seems I may have some new goals to shoot for in the future and I have already turned my mind toward being part of that 2013 master's world team for my age group. I will more than likely pass on the '12 MWC as that would mean no pro races for me in 2012, and I'm not ready to pass on that yet. I'm not sure how that all works at this point, but I think I have as good as chance as any to represent my age group in such a big event in '13. As much as I love mountain bike racing, I am drifting away from traveling and focusing on it as much as I have in the past to focus my training on cross a little better and over the next few years. Cross will be more and more my focus, but mtb will always be on the schedule to prep me for cross. I am just not putting as many eggs in the basket in trying to win every mtb race I enter. I am finding a good plan of attack for training for cross with Coach Don G for cycling combined with Coach Darrell C for the core and strength side that is so vital in cross. Every year is one step up on my building plan at being better at such a cool sport. Combined with the hope of continuing to gain more ancillary support (wheels, products, etc), I'm gonna dream big and plan for racing the Master's World Championships in the near future.

Little steps, little changes, and little thoughts on my plans

for a BIG goal.

How's it goin?

Well, pretty good I guess. As good as I could hope for at this point in the game after surgery minus one little worry (I'll get to that later). I've been trying really hard to take it day by day and not get too upset about the fact that I am waaayyy under power than what I ended last season with. I am just trying to be thankful that I am back on the bike to even know what my power is. As of now I can pull a 90-95 watt average on flat pedals if I try really hard. I get to ride about 5-6 days a week for 1 hour and I hit the gym and core routine about 6 days a week for the same time. I guess that isn't a fitness routine for slackers, so I'm pretty pleased with the amount of time I put into training right now, even though I can't post any killer long rides like some of my other competition.

My 6 week appt with Dr Porter went well and I seem to be on track for the overall 100% goal. Like I have mentioned in the past, I have never trained for cross 100% properly and I'm very excited for that prospect this year. I've been easing out of the cast and into a splint over the past week and by next week I will be out of the cast all together! Right now, I pretty much only wear the cast at work and when the pain is bad. Its gonna take some retraining of my leg and foot muscles to learn how to handle walking again. It just kinda flops around right now. Its amazing how painful a fatigued ankle can be. I also started the elliptical machine for a few minutes to get some ROM back and that was a fun new thing to do at the gym right now. Aside from that, I will start clipping in to spin on the trainer this weekend, but I'm not allowed to clip out for about 4 more weeks - so that means no riding outside at least until late Feb. The risk of having to catch myself or wreck on a fresh ankle out in the big world is scary enough to make me very thankful to stay in on the safe trainer for now. Think of breaking your ankle then breaking it a moment later again. Not a good feeling. Drill holes, metal harpoons and anchors in your bones do not feel good. Right now is a painful times as I try to transition to normal walking again and being more active, so I am looking forward to the next few weeks being over and having less pain with every step.

Our little worry right now seems to be what is causing the nerve pain. I'm having an internal stitch knot reaction on the lateral part of my fibula

.

This is kinda like the bodies way of fighting off a foreign object, but this one isn't supposed to be fought off. I have this inflamed, red, burned hole over the knot and we are hoping it will not get too much worse until it dissolves. Day by day, I keep a close eye on this and I'm saying my prayers I won't need more surgery to take it out. But overall, the ankle is healing nicely and as you can compare from the week 1 picture and this above 7 week picture it looks like a totally different ankle. Amazing how much damage and trauma a body can sustain and heal from!

I've also been able to take down the temporary infirmary that was my downstairs bedroom during my recovery. I can now make it up and down the stairs okay to my master suite. Good thing, since I was ready to get my exercise room back for working out. I even had my friend Deb help me put the total gym together. My first QVC purchase!

So that's how it's going. I feel like I'm in slow motion, but slow is better than stopped.

I'm gonna keep my head up.

I'm still training pretty hard for a gimp!

A Frames

I think we would all agree that all of God's creatures He created are equal of importance and I'm sure He is very fond of each and every one. However, I have to believe that some are a little more special than others. Some animals just seem magical in their existence and seem to glorify perfect form for function. Mostly, these are the top of the food chain creatures. Like elephants, big cats, whales, crocs, octopus, and bears. They just seem to be so magnificent to watch that you can't help but wander if God wanted to combine all the wonders of the cumulative effort of the food chain in that top animal. I wander what it is like to be the at the top of the food chain. The big dog, the untouched, the magical.

So this time of the year is a great time to be a birdwatcher. I've been into following birds now pretty heavy for about 4 years and I find a lot of pleasure in it. I've always been amazed at things that can fly. Who wouldn't want to fly? What an amazing ability. Perfect trail and perfect flow on a mtb ride can almost feel like floating at times and it is a wonderful feeling. But can you imagine flying under your own power? Aside from flying, birds are amazing little creatures. They accomplish feats that are pretty stunning. Just watch a hummingbird in slow motion... it hovers and is quite a little areal acrobat. At just a few ounces, it travels further for migration than most of us ever will in our lifetime. Its heart rate runs around 600 bpm during feeding and decreases to 30 bpm at night to conserve energy! Brilliant. Seriously.

Anyway, one of the special parts of being a cyclist is that we get deep into nature. If your a mtber, you get into parts of forest that get us up close and personal with nature. That's part of the appeal. I seriously doubt mtb'ing would be as special if we took some fake trees and made a fake trail in the middle of an open field. You may not realize you love the woods, but subconsciously you do. As a bird watcher and cyclist, I've been known to stop dead in my path to watch a bird. Some things you really need to slow down and appreciate. God made a lot of cool things around us for us to see and take in, like the top of the food chain animals. They were made to look at, to study, to learn from, to be in wonder of what God can do. Kinda like the greatest of athletes like Ali, Jordan, Phelps, Maradona, Bo Jackson, Mantle, Armstrong, Williams, Magic, Manning, RC, Hoffman, Lopes, and Hawk. Perfect form and function. Today, I met that in the bird world. Their are several favorite birds of mine: the owl, piliated woodpecker, hummingbird, swift, and the peregrine falcon. But none can match the Bald Eagle. It is the master of the bird world and you know it when you witness it hunt in nature. Today, I was blessed to get a tip from my Mom that 4 bald eagles were doing a little ice fishing at the lake. I grabbed my bird gear and headed to watch them for a few hours. I was treated to an adult pair with 2 of their older fledglings. It was pretty amazing. Everything had a purpose for them. What I needed binoculars for, they could see with the naked eye. As one flew over me so low, I couldn't help but feel like time stood still as he floated above me with so much grace and elegance that most Hollywood stars would die for. They demanded respect and the other water fowl gave it to them. I couldn't help but wander if the fledglings knew how special they were to grow up to be. At this point they were constantly egged on by the adults to find their own fish, and in a 6 month time frame they will be Kings and Queens of their own territory. That's some big talons to fill. They are a perfect culmination of every single creature that every single creature eats to make it what it is. A rightly fine showing of the top of the food chain.

I also couldn't help but notice how, even though I remained focused on the grace of the Balds, the people world around me hustled faster than ever. Completely oblivious to the beauty that was around them. I think the Balds seemed aware of us, but not us of them. Like Jack Johnson sings; "slow down you're moving too fast, a frames can't catch you when your moving like that." A- Frames, for those of you who don't surf, are the flow of waves to ride in the ocean, these are the perfect barrel waves to ride. Waves that let us float as one with the earth. I am a firm Christian, but given that I have some Blackfoot Indian running in my blood, I have a special appreciation for Bald Eagles. Eagles are seen as messengers between the Gods and Humans for the Blackfeet. I still think they are messengers, but just between one God and us.

Some things are meant to be enjoyed; athletes, animals and people that are just a little special. Knowing that we are all vital to what they are. I'm just saying: Stop and wait for the A frames sometimes. It's okay to enjoy them, to be in awl of what has been created. Don't miss the A frames of life, God wants us to enjoy them while we are here.

Number, numbers, numbers...

Right now I'm focusing my caged energy on the numbers of my life. Its all about the numbers for me actually. Sometimes I think that us cyclist can get a little hung up on all the number data we are fed these days, but some things really can't be measured unless it is put into facts and figures. I'm not talking about "heart" and motivation, since there is no way to measure that, but all the other things that surround us that can really be broken down with numbers. Right now, I'm paying close attention to them like so:

I'm 5 weeks out from surgery. I have roughly 8 weeks total in the cast. That leaves me 3 more dreadful weeks in this contraption. In 1 week I can start weaning out of the cast for 1-2 hours at home in an air cast splint at night. On the 23rd I go see Dr Porter for my 6 week follow-up. This point is always a good insight to recovery and I look forward to how he thinks things are progressing. He has estimated that I can start to clip into pedals and start riding outside in 2 more months. Maybe by then the 15 degree weather will be about 35 degrees! I hope. But at this point I'd ride in a blizzard just to feel the open road again. While I make my comeback I need to wear a compression hose on my leg for 3 months and a brace for that time too. At about the 6 month mark I should finally start to see an end to the swelling and should be about 100%. Just in time for cross!

Right now I get to do some mild physical therapy at home. This is a big change from my past surgery as I had a different surgeon with a different approach. Now I am getting about a 3 week jump start on keeping a little ROM. Currently, I focus on doing rehab about 3 times during the day. I do about 8 exercises to keep things stretched out. That's 2 sets of 10 reps. After each session I need to ice for about 40 minutes. Icing is like my life saver right now! A little ice goes a long way and is a simple way to help the body heal.

Other numbers in my life include the hours of the night and day I can actually sleep. With the nerve damage full force between 11pm- 5am. I really can't sleep good at those times. So if I need to be up for work at 530am I totally need a nap in the afternoon to make up some z's. Ideally, I can sleep from 5a- 10a, but I'm now back to the real working world. Sleep is vital to recovery right now, so I don't stress about taking naps or sleeping 12 hours at a time. I need it, my body has a lot to rebuild!

Other than that, I am all about the numbers for my workouts. I hit the gym 5 days a week for core, weight conditioning. We all know that's all about numbers. I am doing 3 sets of 15 reps for my variety of exercises I do. I'm hitting a circuit type plan to try and keep my heart rate higher than 100 bpm to hit a aerobic cardio range. This last for about 1-2 hours a day.

On the bike I keep it pretty tight on numbers as to not overdo it. Since I'm still on flat pedals, this isn't too hard to do. My goal is to ride 5 days a week. I get to add 1 minute each day to my ride time as long as the pain and swelling is okay. Tonight I made it up to 49 minutes! I keep it under the 100 watt range, which is easy to do since I'm still pretty sore and weak. I started in the 60 watt average range and now I'm breaking the 80 watt mark! Crazy how I was easily doing 260 watts a little more than a month ago. I also try to keep a close eye on the hr on the bike. I know that if the hr starts creeping up and I'm feeling pain, I need to back off to give the ankle a rest.

Another big number game is calories in and calories out. During racing time, its not such a big deal, but off season is another story for me. I've been doing this cool little LiveStrong application that Johnson Chiropractic turned me on to on the iphone that lets me track all the items I eat and track my workout calories too. It has been a big help in keeping me aware of what's going in and out; and helps to keep a check on the macro nutrients. Since I had some major anemia before and after surgery, I need to pay special attention to this to give the body what it needs to repair and get the hgb back up to 13ish so my o2 can have some places to bind once harder training get under way!

Of course these aren't all the numbers, because there are hours to count at work, money numbers to estimate for all the upcoming equipment I will need to buy, tallying up the number of vacation days I can take for races next year, and estimating how many GU packets I may need from GU. Stuff like that.

They seem to keep me a little focused. I just keep it one day at a time until I hear "starting in 30 seconds... 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, GO!"

Then it will be bell lap-

1 to go-

and then hopefully standing on the 1st place step!

On To The Next One...

Aside from that being a Bad A** song and video by Jay-Z, that's the switch that was finally flipped in my mind last week. I'm finally seeing some improvements in the ankle and I'm starting to look forward to the next season of riding. On to the next one.

"I move onward, the only direction. Can't be scared to fail. Search your perfection. Gotta keep it fresh girl... I'm on to the next one."

It's a scary thing when you have major surgery on a limb that is vital to cycling. Even though the thought of not being a top cyclist was on my mind, the worry that I might have trouble walking and doing my job or taking care of my house was the first concern. Cycling is a lot of who I am, but basic care is a adult requirement. Now that I see that everything is going fairly good, I'm starting to allow some hope back in my mind for getting back to racing on top. Its also very scary that I may come back and not be the same, maybe not as good. But I really can't be scared to fail, because who would I be failing really? No one. Besides, I'm gonna work my butt off to come back even stronger.

"World can't hold me, too much ambition... on to the next one."

I love, love, love this time of year in a way. I like planning the next year of racing. Thinking and choosing new races and places to go, hitting the old favorites that I have raced at so many times, the prospect of improving on previous results, thoughts of riding some support for teammates, and thinking about how the master plan will all come together. It's fun to piece it all together like a hard puzzle, taking time to think and plan it all out and laugh at how it seems like it will fall together like a perfect receipt, but knowing that once the season gets here it will be like a space shuttle take off! It will be a crazy, mind blowing chaos. Things will go wrong, unexpected events will occur, it will be stressful at times, it will be a whirlwind, things will be added and dropped. But in the end it will all fall together as it should and I will be left savoring

the adventures of the season. Kinda like after a shuttle takes off then settles in the stillness of space looking back at the beauty of earth.

The ankle continues to make improvements. I'm up to 35 minutes on the bike. That matters. It may not seem like too much time on a bike to a normal cyclist, but that's a pretty big deal to me right now. It helps me feel like I'm moving forward and keeps to legs going and the confidence up. It helps me feel alive. I've also ditched the crutches completely. It feels funny to walk on both legs again, and its nice to have my hands free to carry coffee or talk on my cell phone while on the move. I still need the little go cart for longer distances, but I'm build up the endurance. I've also been able to hit the gym almost everyday and have steadily stepped up the intensity. I actually love the gym in the winter and I enjoy the change of workouts from the bike training. The ankle has also improved greatly in the amount of swelling I was having as you can see in the picture. So much so that I can actually feel and see the suture knots under the skin from some of the repairs that where done. They are kinda like bee-bees under the skin waiting to pop out. I was also able to sleep under the covers for the first time last night. The hugeness of the cast and the weight of the blankets make it almost impossible to sleep under the covers. I made this little pillow lift at the foot of the bed and that helped me last night finally sleep a little better.

Its a new year and that brings hope along with it for a lot of people. We love to have hope and it's a really important feeling for us to have. Because without hope we don't have much. I'm thankful to be getting a little better, even though it's a long way to go, but I can start to hope for things the future days hold. I thank God for my hope. Because if anything matters, than everything matters.

I just move on to the next day, then to the next one. "Y'all should be afraid of what I'm gonna do next." I'm hoping and planning on the next season to be even better than the last one!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM1RChZk1EU